The Life of a Nerdy Army Wife

I won a blog award!

2011-09-29T13:38:00.000-07:00

It was given to me by my best neighbor friend Janey !

See? How cool is that?

Now I am supposed to share a few things about myself.

1. Starbucks cannot spell my name for anything. I have gotten Maghew and McAgen written on my cup and I am not even kidding. lol

2. I have a 5mo old son named Xander and he is too cute for words.

3. I was born in NW Ohio, raised in Memphis TN, went to college in NW Ohio at BGSU, got my first teaching job in Topeka, KS, and now I am living in Hawaii. I have moved so much you would have thought I was an Army brat, but really my move to Hawaii is my first military move lol.

4. I am Wiccan. It is an Earth religion. It is NOT devil worshiping. :)

And now to pass on the award to someone else.

I think I have to pass on this award to my bestie Noel because she just all around rocks. I don't really follow any more blogs regularly so I only have one person to pass this on to.

Wow I am slacking

2011-09-09T13:12:00.000-07:00

I know, I know, I am the world's worst blogger. However, I have a good reason. I am taking care of and raising my perfect little boy. So lets see what is new in my life. We finally finished the bench at the end of the bed and the end table refinishing. We are working on putting in a new flowerbed in the back yard. I got a job! I am an after school nanny for 2 little boys. It is paying $200 a week and now I feel like I am contributing to the household again. Brian will be deploying to Afghanistan in a few months so the company is gearing up and doing lots of training. Brian and I are trying to make the most of what little time we have left together. Xander is getting bigger by the minute. He is rolling quite easily now. He is getting close to sitting up on his own. We are going to try to start solids next week. His fine motor skills are coming along nicely and he can reach for an grasp big items now. I think that is all the time I have. I hope I will be able to post again sometime soon during another morning nap.

We got family photos taken

2011-07-20T13:53:00.000-07:00

And they turned out wonderful!
Enjoy!

New smart phone

2011-07-04T10:53:00.001-07:00

Brian and I finally broke down and got new phones. We had beat the old Lotuses to hell and back. We both got the Samsung Replenish and we LOVE them! They have a built in keyboard and a touch screen. They are easy to use and durable. The only 2 dislikes are battery life and the camera doesn't have the megapixels to scan barcodes. But that is nothing a little typing and car charger can't fix. I in fact am typing this entry from my phone very easily. :)

New Design

2011-06-28T18:10:00.001-07:00

So I decided my Blog needed a new design. Something to kinda spruce it up a bit. Let me know what you think.

Nerdy awwwwww

2011-06-27T11:54:00.000-07:00

My parents came to visit!

2011-06-24T17:08:00.000-07:00

They were here in Hawaii for 2 weeks mostly to see Xander and partially to be tourists. I had so much fun with them. They absolutely loved Xander. They were so supportive of me and how Xander was doing. And, the best part is they took tons of pictures.

Oh and compared to our first family picture with Xander in April, you can totally tell I've already lost close to 30 lbs. :D

What would it be like if everyone was the same?

2011-06-24T00:46:00.000-07:00

The movie Pleasantville explored this idea in 1998. I think Toby's character said it best: "You can't stop something that's inside you." I would not want to live in a place where everyone is the same. I am proud to be different. My husband is proud to be different. We are different together. We have chosen to raise our child to be as different as he wants to be. If that means being a nerd we will support that, if it means being a witch we will support that, if that means being gay we will support that. We will allow him to choose the way he wants to live his life because here in America we have that freedom. If you do not like what I am saying, BITE ME!

My Anxiety

2011-06-22T17:21:00.000-07:00

So I have been diagnosed for a while now with OCD and Social Anxiety Disorder. Before I got pregnant I was on Zoloft for both. Now, obviously I cannot be on that drug with breastfeeding so I have been "dealing" with my issues. I am sure you are wondering what my issues are.
Most of my OCD deals with food and cleaning
1. I must eat even amounts of food. If it is uneven I will split the last bite in half.
2. Each bite will only be chewed on one side of my mouth then on the other side for the next bite.
3. I only eat one food on my plate at a time
4. I will not eat certain foods like Onions because of their texture
5. I am mostly normal with my cleaning but I go on cleaning binges especially when my life seems a bit out of control.
6. My work place/ desk is the most organized you will ever see. I must have even numbers of everything.
7. My books and things on shelves and in drawers are organized by size.
8. I bite my nails not because it is a nervous habit but because they are uneven

Social Anxiety
1. I hate driving anywhere by myself
2. Driving in traffic gives me panic attacks
3. I don't like going to events when my husband can't be there.
4. I will cancel on people if my husband can't be at the event because he can't be there to keep me calm
5. I will cancel on people if I have had another social event earlier in the day
6. My usual excuse is that I have a migraine/ I'm sick or Xander is sick.
7. Don't take it personally if I cancel on you. Believe me it's not you it is 100% me.

I hope after I am done breast feeding that I can get back on my Zoloft. Until that point.... I deal.

Letting my Freak Flag Fly

2011-06-06T19:38:00.000-07:00

So apparently according to an anonymous commenter, I am too "different" and "rebellious".
In celebration of my originality, I am going to post a list of things that make me unique and different than anyone else and what I love most about myself.
1. I am a huge Star Wars fan
2. I am a middle school social studies teacher
3. I used to decorate my classroom in star wars memorabilia
4. I have over 15 star wars t-shirts
5. I have every single star wars pez dispenser available.
6. I have watched the original trilogy so many times I have the lines memorized
7. During the labor of my son, I watched all of the original trilogy and he was born during "Luke, I am your father"
8. I have read all the Harry Potter books.
9. I have read all the Twilight books
10. I have been to the midnight showings of every Star Wars, Harry Potter, and Twilight movie
11. I decorate my house with Fantasy and Star Wars Posters
12. My husband owned the Fantasy Posters and I owned the Star Wars posters before we met.
13. I own every season of the shows Charmed, Stargate SG-1, Stargate atlantis, Firefly, Buffy, and Angel.
14. I have been studying wicca for 5 years now
15. I enjoy shopping at Hot Topic and Pinup girl clothing
16. I bought star wars onesies for my son
17. My hubby and I would be super proud if our son ends up being a nerd
18. My husband's nickname is Dragon
19. My husband and I are so alike it is scary, only where I am obsessed with Star Wars, he is obsessed with Transformers.
20. My husband and I both have tattoos
21. I am an ancient world history freak and I love studying ancient cultures
22. I have an IQ of 160
23. I love to display the 100's of books I read
24. My Goddess is Athena and my husband's God is Anubis
25. I intend to allow my son to choose whatever religion he wants to follow
26. I cannot wait to buy my son baby chucks and his first set of legos
27. I have a photographic memory
28. I never made lower than a B in school (other than in Math lol)
29. I made deans list in College
30. I play the flute
31. I was in Tau Beta Sigma music service sorority in college
32. I was in Marching and Concert band in high school in college
33. I met my first husband in college and he is a music teacher
34. I divorced him because he was mentally abusive among other bad qualities
35. I took dance classes all the way through college
36. Tap is my best dance style and I still own tap shoes
37. I am better than most when it comes to working on computers, other than my friend Patrick who works for Dell lol.
38. My husband loves me for me
39. My husband and my tastes are almost identical
40. My husband and I just upgraded our engagement/ wedding rings. Here are a couple of pictures of mine:

If anything on this list bothers you too much, you can feel free to not read my blog anymore. Remember, If you cannot say something nice, then don't say it at all.

I know I have been slacking.

2011-06-02T17:42:00.000-07:00

But taking care of a baby is tough work. Plus we just had Brian's Dad and Step-mom come to visit last week. That was a horrible adventure. His Step-mom has no concept of boundaries. Here is an example. We bought an 80 pack of k-cups at Costco the evening they came in. By the third day they were there, they had used 40 of them. that is right 40 cups of coffee in 3 days. WTF! And K-cups are not cheap by any stretch of the imagination.

Xander is sleeping right now. We have found that if he gets a two hour nap in the morning and a 3 hour nap in the afternoon, then he sleeps most of the way through the night. He is still pretty Colicy but not as bad as before.

My Parents come into town tomorrow and will be in town for the next 2 weeks.

So about a month ago I got a letter from the State of Kansas. It was regarding my state retirement. Apparently because I only worked 4 years instead of 5 there in Kansas, I wasn't vested and had to pull out the money that was put into their retirements system. So last week about $4500 were deposited into our checking account. We used that money to get several things.
#1 was a new Living Room.
We got a 42" LG LED TV, LG BluRay and Surround Sound, Coffee Table, End Tables, A Leather Couch, A leather love seat, New Lamps, Baskets to go under the end tables, Frames for our posters on the wall, And a new rug. And two new posters and two throw pillows.
#2 was the Lanai.
We got tiki torches, String lights, a weed eater, an american flag, and a US Army spinner. We also moved the old grey couch onto the Lanai for comfy seating, and some plastic dinnerware.
#3 Was Xander
We got a new Tummy time mat, Several outfits, a swim suit, a tent for the beach with SPF 50, sunscreen, and a new blanket, and a johnny jump up
#4 was the Car
Brian got a new fuel filter and some other filters to help improve his gas mileage.
#5 Was the Bedroom
We got an additional end table for Brian's side of the bed, and we moved the old coffee table upstairs to become a bench at the end of the bed and I made a pillow for on top.
#6 Was for us
Brian got a pair of shorts and a polo shirt, I got 4 nursing tanks and a pair of jeans. We also ordered our upgraded wedding rings from Zales.com (they come in tomorrow)

Here are a few pictures of what we bought.

Tummy Time Mat

Loveseat

TV and surround sound

couch and pillows

end tables

rug and coffee table

other end table

posters

Lanai

couch in lanai

string lights

flag and tiki's

spinner and tikis

Johnny jump up

plastic plates and bowls

Bench, I made that pillow :)

nightstand

My favorite of his new clothes

Swimsuit!

Happy Baby

2011-05-13T15:37:00.000-07:00

Well Xander is a month old on Sunday. We have had our ups and our downs. He is gaining weight and breastfeeding like a champ. Our only issue is lots and lots of gas. Hopefully, his digestion system will mature soon enough to process his food a bit better. He tends to sleep a 5 hour block and a 2 hour block at night. His only sleeping issue is that he only wants to go to bed at 10pm no earlier which doesn't give Brian and I any alone time. We would like him to go to be around 8pm or so, hopefully we can start working towards that soon so Brian and I can have some adult time too. Right now it is 12:30pm and he is taking a nap. So without further ado Here is the picture of the happy baby:

Happy Easter

2011-04-24T14:19:00.000-07:00

From our family to yours.

Our Birth Story

2011-04-18T23:16:00.000-07:00

I woke up on the morning of April 14th and called Labor and Delivery to see if they had a room available for our induction. We were told to call back later so we waited till 8:30 and called back and they had a rooms for us. We arrived at the hospital at 9am and they admitted us and got my IV started and checked for dilation. I was a very soft 2cm so they started me on pitocin to get the contractions going and they inserted a bulb to dilate me quickly. By 1pm the bulb had fallen out and I was 4cam dilated so they broke my water. I had been doing fine wih pain management until they broke my water. Afterwards the pain was so strong that I would tense up my whole body and the contractions were being counter productive. They narcotics they gave me did nothing for the pain and dropped Xander's heart rate so, I chose to get an epidural after about a half an our of horrible pain. After that it was smooth sailing. I was checked at 11pm and I was already 9cm dilated so they sat me up to allow gravity to do its thing. We were thrilled that the OB I had been seeing the whole pregnancy was able to deliver our son. At 11:45 they had me do 2 practice pushes and I already pushed him into the birth canal. They let gravity take over for a few more minutes while they set the room up. I officially started delivery pushes at 12:15. Xander Orion ******** was born at 12:29 April 15th with only 15 minutes of pushing. Aparently I am a pushing champ lol. He was 7lbs 10.8oz and 19 inches long. He was born with a full head of light brown hair and huge feet. I torn in 2 small places on the inside but did not need an epistiotime. We are the two happiest parents alive.

It has been a while

2011-04-11T00:48:00.000-07:00

So here is my update. Brian is now on Paternity leave. I am due to be induced on the 14th. I have a Non-stress Test and a tour of labor and delivery on Monday. On Tuesday I have my final OB appointment. Last appointment I had my membranes stripped and that did pretty much nothing lol. I have been having regular contractions today but they have been 30 minutes apart. I have decided to not have an epidural for the labor because the thought of a tube being stuck into my spine makes me nauseated. Plus, without the epidural I will be able to walk and use a birthing ball and sit up during the delivery to allow gravity to help and I will be able to feel to push. We are all packed and ready to go. Both cars have the infant carrier bases installed. We have 3 bags and a boppy laying on the couch ready to be picked up and carried to the car. All I need to do is print off the phone list for my hubby. Brian is excited and nervous lol. On the day of induction I will be waking up at 5:00 to shower and eat. At 6:30 we will call the hospital to make sure there is space available for us. If there isn't I will either have to call back later or call on Friday. When I get admitted they will put an IV in and will start administering Pitocin to enhance my contractions. I am already dilated to at least 2cm so they wont have to dilate me. Xander will be on monitors the whole time because I am high risk. They will wait to see if my water breaks on its own, if it doesn't they will break it for me. I am hoping my body doesn't fight it because they will be inducing me at 39 weeks due to my chronic hypertension and family history. I really would like to avoid a c-section if possible. So yeah Thursday I will more than likely be a mommy. I will definitely post pics afterwards.

I just spent 2.5 days in the hospital

2011-03-17T14:24:00.000-07:00

and I am still pregnant. I went in on Monday for a standard NST. My blood pressure was 153/76. They sent me back to an ultrasound to check my placental fluid and it was down to 5.2 centimeters. They immediately checked me into Labor and delivery because my fluid was so low. I got poked prodded and the put me on an IV. I stayed in the L&D room overnight and they had Xander up to the NST moniters all night so I had to stay on my back and I didn't sleep at all. Then the next morning they checked my fluid and it was back up to 8.6 after 4 bags of saline solution into the IV. They sent me down to the neonatal ward for the next day and I had 2 NST's and my blood pressure was checked every hour. I spent the night down there and actually slept. I had one more NST this morning as well as a fluid check and I am up to 9.6. My BP was nice and normal the entire time I was in the hospital bed. I was discharged around noon. I have a NST to go to tomorrow and an appointment with my OB. I am just hoping my fluid stays up in the normal range. If not they may have to have me give birth early. I am 35 weeks today. I do have to say it was nice having everyone wait on my hand and foot.

Happy Birthday to Me

2011-03-09T07:38:00.001-08:00

Its my 29th birthday today. :) Crazy thought of the day. This time next year I will turn 30 and leave my 20's behind. Gosh I still remember when I turned 20. Where does the time go?

Double Annoyance at Chili's

2011-03-05T23:52:00.001-08:00

So Brian and I decide to go to Chili's for dinner last night. I go in to get us a table while he goes to the auto store next door to pick up a part for his motorcycle. I go up to the hostess and tell her party of 2. She says if I want to we can sit at the bar and eat there no wait. I said that probably is not going to work seeing as how I am pregnant. She looks me up and down and says "Oh you are?" I'm sorry but I am just 9 months pregnant. I look 9 months pregnant, are you insane wanting to sit me at a bar with high stools. You must be on crack lady. So then I am told the wait is 20 minutes. I go sit in the waiting area and a woman with a 7yo sits down next to me. At this point Xander starts kicking me in the ribs. So, I start rubbing that area. The woman notices and asks me how far along. I say the beginning of my 9th month. Her jaw drops and she says "why are you out? You should be at home relaxing!". I told her politely that I need to eat too. Why the heck should I be at home? Am I incapable of going out to eat? I am not going to pop at this very second. In fact I am not due till next month. So seriously, mind your own business. Blah!

Baby Update

2011-01-25T13:20:00.000-08:00

Ok So I had my baby shower on Saturday. It was a blast! We had it at Dave and Busters. Pictures will follow a tiny rant lol. So I had my 27 week dr's appointment yesterday. I got stuck seeing the bad doctor yet again. (eyeroll) So we go in there and he tells me that based on my blood tests from friday that 1. I do not have gestational diabetes, 2. I am not anemic, 3. That because I am rH- I need to have the rH- shot. So he gives me the paperwork to go down to the blood bank and get the shot. I get to the blood bank and they say they have no record of any rH- bloodwork being done at the hospital. Well I did do it, but in Ft. Riley so that doesn't count. The idiot dr was supposed to ask for the blood draw with all the rest of the tests I did on Friday and never did. He just assumed I already had it done, just like he assumed that I had my 24 hr urine sample already done. He is such an idiot. So after some arguing and some explaining we settled on a compromise with the blood bank. I had not eaten on Monday so I could not give blood then, so when I go in on thursday for my 28 week ultrasound I will go in early and have the blood drawn and then they will run the tests while I am having my ultrasound. Then after the ultrasound I will get my rH- shot. UGH!!!!!!

Ok done with the complaining. Here are the happy pictures:

Nerdy Video of the week.

2011-01-19T22:19:00.000-08:00

Enjoy!

Picture Post!

2011-01-16T12:35:00.000-08:00

So I have been slacking but I do have some pictures for your entertainment. The first set are of pictures I took during our Marriage retreat here in Hawaii at the Hale Koa hotel at the end of December. The second set are of the baby bedding we just got in. Next time I post I will have pictures of my Baby shower which is next Saturday at Dave and Busters here in Hawaii. :)

Hilarious Military Spouse Video

2011-01-01T13:26:00.000-08:00

How to answer the dumb questions during a deployment. Disclaimer*** contains foul language.

Thank you ArmyWife101 for posting this video!

Merry Christmas

2010-12-25T08:16:00.001-08:00

In Honor of living in Hawaii, I give you a Merry Christmas from the Islands.

New/Old Doctor

2010-12-21T20:22:00.001-08:00

So I saw my "new" doctor today. He was actually the Doctor I went to see when I was 14 weeks along to discuss my family history and he was the one to put me in Complicated OB in the first place. He was awesome! He knew all about my history, asked what baby we were having, actually ordered the 24 hr. Urine sample and some more blood work. He listened to Xander's heartbeat (man he was a mover today). He also discussed the RH- shot and the Gestational Diabetes testing and when those would happen as well as ordering another set of ultrasounds at 28 weeks. So I get to see my baby again. He is like a million times better than my last doctor. I requested to have only him from now on. So all my ladies here in Hawaii, request Dr. Zoltz. He does normal and complicated OB. :)

Oh also I didn't gain a single pound but my blood pressure was up a bit.

So Frustrated with my OB, Tripler, and my hubby's CoC

2010-12-09T17:27:00.000-08:00

Ok first of all I have been labeled as Complicated OB for my pregnancy. Why? because I have "highish" blood pressure. Not high blood pressure just highish. todays was 138/75. It is high enough for them to be concerned but not high enough for them to do anything. Not only that but I also have an anxiety disorder that makes it next to impossible to drive in Honolulu traffic without having a severe panic attack.

So we got a note from the doctor requesting that Brian drive me to the appointments. Brian's CoC was fine with this for a while. I made sure all my appointments were early afternoon so as to not conflict with anything. Now they are saying I have too many appointments (every other week) So I should just "suck it up" and drive myself. Driving to Tripler from Wheeler is no easy matter I drive right through downtown Honolulu. It is about 20 miles but it takes close to an hour to drive it.

They were not going to let B go until I remembered that this was the appointment after my 20 week Ultrasound and they were supposed to go over the results. So B begs and pleads and gets to go. But he owes them big time.

We get to the OB and they take my vitals without even looking at my chart at all the nurse take my blood pressure and is like "is it always this high?" Uhhhhh Duh lady why do you think I am going to Complicated OB. Look at my freaking chart. Then we go see the doctor. This is only the 2nd time I have seen him because of the PCS and getting a complicated OB referral and all. And for the second time in a row he just asks how I am doing and finds the baby's heart beat and THAT IS ALL! I had to push the issue to find out what his plan for my elevated blood pressure is. And basically he has no plan. He is just going to "wait and see". I asked him to lay out the plans of when I was going to be going to my appointments and he finally told be that after 32 weeks I am going to be going in 2x a week for NST and still every other week to see the doctor. So I could potentially be going all the way to Tripler 3x a week. Which will start right when Brian will be in the field for a month.

Oh and I will be induced about a week to two weeks early. I asked what would happen if my blood pressure goes up and he skips the bed rest and goes right to saying that I will be admitted to the hospital. Then I ask him about the 20 week ultrasound and he asks ME what the tech said. He didn't even look at the ultrasounds. GAHHHHHHHHHH! I am so angry. Two weeks from now I am seeing a different doctor because mine will be on Christmas Leave. I am going to see what this doctor is like and hopefully see this doctor instead for the rest of the time. Also because I am high blood pressure they are supposed to do a 24 hr urine sample with me for a baseline and they have yet to do that. They only Urine sample I have given is in week 8 for my initial and that was at Ft. Riley.

Please tell me I am not getting upset over nothing but this is really frustrating me. I hate feeling like a number.

On a separate note: If you didn't hear already Brian and I are pregnant with a very healthy Boy who we are naming Xander Orion.

Life is busy

2010-11-13T22:27:00.000-08:00

B and I got mostly moved into our new place. We still have lots of boxes around because the movers broke ALL of our bookshelves (among other things). We ordered our Mini and it should be here at the beginning of December. (Pictures will follow)
I am 18 weeks this Wednesday. We have been fighting with Brian's unit to allow him to come to my appointments. They are being Stupid with a capital S. They say I have too many appointments. I am complicated OB, I get seen once every 2 weeks, of course I have lots of appointments. Speaking of that, I am considered Complicated because I have "high" blood pressure. It isn't that high but because my mom had issues with high blood pressure when giving birth to my sister and had a cerebral hemorrhage because of it, they are being cautious.
I have been working for about 3 weeks now. I am a nanny for a 1 year old girl. It is fairly easy work. The hardest part is walking up the stairs over and over to check on her during her nap.
Brian and I are still trying to get stuff to set up our house so we have been busy the last few weekends and have not had a chance to just relax. Soon enough we won't have a chance to relax when the baby comes so I hope things around here start to calm down some.
Speaking of baby, we have our baby registry set up. If you want to see how we want to decorate the baby's room you can check it out. It is on Amazon.com. You can look it up under my name (Meghan Sestokas).
We are trying to buy enough diapers for the first year. So anyone know how many of each size we should buy? We have been picking boxes up whenever we see them on sale.
We also want to buy enough clothing for the first year as well but we are waiting on that until we find out the sex.
Speaking on that we will know two weeks from wednesday. But, I won't be plastering it online for a bit. I am going to send out our Christmas cards with the picture of the ultrasound. So I will not post the sex for about 2 weeks to allow everyone to get their cards. If you want a christmas card, email me your address. ( mousez3982@gmail.com)

Wow that was quite the update!

Love you all!

Our first baby picture.

2010-11-02T18:49:00.001-07:00

Droid is adorable! I am 16 weeks tomorrow.

Ok General Update

2010-10-20T22:51:00.000-07:00

I will put pictures up of Hawaii soon enough. But until that point....

Alright we got housing on Island and we just got the call today that it will be available on Friday, thank goodness. I am 14 weeks pregnant today so I am officially in the second trimester. We have been having issues with getting Brian's car inspected here because he has done so many mods to it lol. Our household goods will be here supposedly on Monday, but we will just have to wait and see. We have gotten all of our forwarded mail so far which is awesome. Brian just got to his new unit this week. He is in Echo Company 3-25 Aviation on Wheeler AAF. Our new house will also be on Wheeler. It is historic housing and I am excited to live so close to work. Speaking of work, I got a nanny job on Wheeler for a 1 yo little girl. I am going to be getting paid $250 a week which will more than pay for our brand new Mini Clubman S. Which, btw we ordered on the day we arrived on island lol. It is supposed to be here somewhere around the new year so Brian and I have to share a car until then. On the pregnancy front they are monitoring my blood pressure and having me see a neurologist and a genetic counselor because of my mom. (She had a cerebral hemorrhage during labor with my younger sister) I see the counselor tomorrow and I still need a referral to the neurologist which I will get at my OBGYN appointment on Monday. I feel like I am forgetting something so I guess I will just have to add it later. This is all for now though. I do promise pictures but B and I have been running around so much I haven't had a chance to truly enjoy the island yet.

I'm alive

2010-10-07T19:13:00.001-07:00

And in Hawaii

Bigger update to come with pictures later.

10 week appointment

2010-09-22T14:28:00.000-07:00

Started off with a weigh in and blood pressure then B and I went into the exam room and I had a full body exam including a pap smear and breast exam. I found out I am RH negative so I will need that shot before the baby is born. Then they surprised us and because I am almost not far along to hear the heartbeat with the monitor they did an ultrasound instead. B and I got to see baby Droid and even were able to see the heartbeat. It was soo reassuring to actually see the baby. We are ecstatic. I almost cried but held back the tears.

The Movers are Here!

2010-09-14T09:36:00.000-07:00

They are packing up as I type this. We have way more stuff than I thought we did lol. All of the stuff the movers won't take is pretty annoying. I guess my neighbor Christina will just be getting alot of food from us lol. They take the stuff away on Thursday. Then Brian and I are left with an air mattress, our toiletries, the clothing we are packing, a small flat screen TV, our laptops, all the stuff they won't pack, camping kitchen stuff, our cable box, and our modems. We will be "roughing it" for about 2 full weeks and we will leave here on the 1st to go to my grandparents in Kansas City. We will be in KC for about 4 days and plan on going to the Ren. Fest while we are there. We catch the flight on the 5th to Hawaii. We fly first to Chicago then to Hawaii. I have not looking forward to the second leg because in my pregnant state I am going to have to spend alot of time on that tiny bathroom on board lol. Luckily, Binx will fly with us and we will get there in time to take him from quarantine that day. Brian has already started out processing on post. I am so excited! We are almost out of the hell hole.

Fun facts about Meghan #933

2010-09-11T08:17:00.000-07:00

I cannot hold a grudge to save my life.

No seriously. In middle school I had a girl who stole my pens every week and tripped me in the hall. I was really good friends with her in high school.

I have had friends that I have deleted from facebook. They took the effort to add me back, I will say yes regardless of who they are.

I know that I have as well as everyone else have had bad days, weeks, and months. We have all said things we don't really mean because we were either in a really bad mood or following along with peer pressure. I get it, I understand.

That is why if a person makes the effort to add me back as a friend on facebook after being deleted, I will 99 times out of 100 say yes.

I even had a few people blocked. I did this to give space to allow us to cool down and not litter up other people's facebook pages with our anger. Because they don't deserve our issues to spread to their pages.

After the whole mess had cooled down and was forgotten I unblocked those people. It was unnecessary.

It is also unnecessary to have 1000's of friends on facebook because I talked to you once for a split second. If I am not talking to a person on facebook after a while I will delete because I like to keep my facebook clean. It is not that I don't like that person it was just that we weren't talking and friends talk.

That being said, if any of them were to add me back right now I would say yes.

I give people more chances than most deserve. I think it comes from growing up with a sister. I had to forgive and forget with her because she will always be my sister. That has crossed over into my personal relationships as well. Sometimes it bites me, like thinking that marriage was going to change my first husband. But for the most part the ebbing and waning of friends has allowed me to find a true core of really amazing women who I know I can talk to about anything and know they won't go spreading it around all of kingdom come lol.

So all that being said, If you add me on facebook, I will say yes. If after a few months we aren't really talking you will be deleted. After all, facebook is just a computer program........

Appointment update

2010-09-10T06:47:00.000-07:00

So I had my appointment on wednesday. It went well and it sucked all at the same time.....

I got there 15 minutes ahead of time and they set me down with a novel of paperwork to fill out while I ate my breakfast. Then I turned in the clipboard and waited about 30 minutes to be called back. We sat with the doctor for another 30 minutes answering her questions and taking my blood pressure. She told me everything I already knew... Only gain 15 lbs, only eat one can of tuna a week, no big game fish (which may be an issue in Hawaii lol), no sushi, no smoking, no drinking.. No here is some good news though, I can stay on all my allergy meds for my asthma which I had taken myself off of because I didn't know if it was safe or not, but, yay for Singulair and Zyrtec!!!! Then I went downstairs for blood and urine samples. I tried to warn the girl taking my blood that I don't give blood very well but she didn't believe me.... I had to give 5 vials of blood. She stuck me just fine, I shoot out blood like a champ but around vial number 3 I started cold sweating and B said the color dropped out of my face and my hands got like ice. She put the bandage on my arm and then she actually looked at my face and kinda freaked out. She layed me back and started fanning me until I felt better. I tried to warn her... This happens every single time I give blood, even when I got my tattoo. And it is not like I can't take the small amount of pain. I honestly think that it is my body going into shock for some reason. But after I recover, I am fine. Then I went in and gave the urine sample. This was the first time IN MY LIFE I didn't have issues with giving urine, I guess preggo pees are good for something lol. I have my next appointment at 9am on September 22nd and at that appointment we get to hear the heartbeat.

I guess I should update

2010-08-29T19:39:00.001-07:00

I am almost 7 weeks pregnant.

The baby doesn't like chicken period.

B fixed our vehicles.

On wednesday we start our crazy PCS business.

I am going to lose my mind.

I will have more to update after my first doctors appointment.

:)

Big Big Big News

2010-08-15T14:13:00.000-07:00

We're Pregnant!!!!!!!!

It only took the first month of trying when B got home from Iraq. I guess both of our bodies were just waiting for him to be home permanently. We will be due mid April. We are sooooo excited! Oh and before you ask we will not be finding out the sex of the baby so from now till April the baby will be know as our little Droid. (yeah we are nerds....so what?)

Ok Homecoming Update

2010-07-22T09:11:00.000-07:00

He got in around 10pm friday night. About an hour later than they were supposed to. The homecoming ceremony was hot and short by the time they finally got there. Here is a happy picture for you.

Saturday we drove to Topeka. Went to tacos el sol for lunch. Went to the mall. Saw Despicable Me. And went to Pinks All Out at Heartland Park . Here is another pic for Y'all.

Sunday we did shopping around Manhattan and hung around the house.
Monday we went on a date to Olive Garden and to see Eclipse. We took a picture because Brian wants to document every date we go on.

Tuesday we spent the whole day indoors just reconnecting. I think Tuesday was my favorite day because I had him all to myself, no one else around.
Wednesday he had to go into work to get travel pay taken care of and I went to a transportation brief for our PCS. We changed the oil on the bike and tightened up the car to get it ready for tonight.
Today Brian is at SRP all day getting all of his medical stuff taken care of and if he is off early enough tonight we are driving out to Heartland Park in Topeka so Brian can run his car down the 1/4 mile stretch there to see how quick his car is.
Friday his classes start and I am allowed to go so I think I might just so I can hang out with him more. I am Still trying to make up for lost time and I hate being away from him for extended periods of time.
Here is one more picture for y'all to enjoy.

He is home!

2010-07-19T19:59:00.001-07:00

I will post a better update later.

I hate

2010-07-15T07:41:00.001-07:00

Sandstorms.

He was supposed to be in my arms by now.

He is not.

Stupid Sandstorms preventing them from taking off.

I just want him back in my arms.

More waiting.....

My reflections on our first deployment together

2010-07-11T11:46:00.000-07:00

Our first deployment is finally coming to an end so I decided that I would reflect on this past year.

I was thrown into the military lifestyle. We met in November and were married in April. He deployed to Iraq on July 20th. I remember realizing in about March how tough this deployment would be. Especially during our first year of marriage. The first day of the deployment I sobbed my fool head off. I was so alone. I went very quickly from my bad marriage into my relationship with Brian, I had not been really alone in almost 10 years. I didn't know what to do with myself. So I went home. I was already headed there for my sister's wedding in mid August so I just figured I would head out there early. It was a mistake. I was not able to come to terms with the loss of my husband on my own and I broke down several times in that first month. The hardest day for me was my sister's wedding. Seeing everyone around me so happy and in love killed me. I was breaking apart. I could not deal and everyone was pulling on me from different directions and all I wanted to do is be alone. I actually left the reception really early and never even danced at my sister's wedding because my anxiety made me not able to function. I drove home and things started to get easier.

Brian and I decided to try to get pregnant over r&r. Our conversations revolved around the possible baby, it was what was keeping us going. He got home for r&r the day after thanksgiving. We had an amazing time. We were sooo happy spending time together. There was no weirdness no space we were one again. He reenlisted and got Hawaii and was promoted to e5. He goes back and I had my hopes held high that we got pregnant.....And we didn't. It hit us both very hard not being able to be there for each other in person.

We got back into the swing of the deployment. In it for the long haul. We had our ups we had our downs. We tried to plan for our future. The Internet drove us nuts and so did Brian hopping around from Platoon to Platoon. He was getting pretty depressed. And then his mom went into the hospital. He was brought home on emergency leave. She was diagnosed with Chrons disease and had part of her intestines removed. Brian and I tried once again to get pregnant unsuccessfully (which again caused huge depression with the both of us) One of our closest couple friends went through a divorce and we somewhat got pulled into it. It was a bad time for us in general. We fought more than we were happy. On the positive during that time, we had our 1st anniversary and both of our birthdays.

Then we started focusing on him coming home. In may my job ended and I got very depressed for an entire month. I stayed in bed and it was a very dark time for me. Brian was very worried. End of June and I finally realized how close it was from him getting home. And then we had a bad storm and all 3 of our vehicles got ruined. I had to deal with it all on my own and did it well. I am very proud of myself.

I have learned alot about myself during this deployment. 1. I am a very strong woman. 2. Our relationship ill last forever 3. I do not need my family to do anything in my life, but they are nice to have around. 4. The holidays are the worst because it is a constant reminder of not having your love one near. 5. I know I made the best decision ever in marrying Brian 6. I would do it all over again because Brian is worth it 7. Brian loves me unconditionally and I have never felt that before in my entire life.

I cannot believe it is almost done. I am very proud of myself for surviving.

Unassociated Drama

2010-07-07T17:18:00.000-07:00

Ok so Brian's unit is one of those that only refers to the soldiers as last names. They barely ever give the sex of the person they are talking about. And, the unit is big like 300 people big. Brian is a SGT. He is alot different from the other SGTs in his unit because he likes to look out for the little guy. So people talk like Sestokas did this for me and Sestokas did that for me.

Brian has a very distinctive car. It is a dark blue Scion TC with rims, lowered, mirror tint and a silver wing on the back. Everyone in the unit wives included know that that is Sestokas's car. To make it more noticable it has his car club sticker on the Sunroof front panel that says "Criminal Intent". So needless to say everyone knows the car.

I have been driving Brian's car this whole deployment because it is fun, fast and I look good driving it lol. And because I am proud of myself learning to drive a stick.

So far there have been a rash of divorces in his unit during this deployment. Of the married soldiers in the unit (about 125) 50% are ending in divorce at the end of this deployment. It is absolutely horrendous!

Well on 3 separate occasions Brian has been accused of having an affair with another soldier while deployed........

These soldiers are all married men....

Why do you ask?
1. they hear all the time about how awesome Sestokas is.
2. They don't know the sex of Sestokas so they assume because he is nice he must be a she.
3. They have seen me driving Sestokas's car around post.
4. They are looking for an easy out to their marriage.

people please don't involve us with your petty 9th grade

We are happily married. Neither of us have ever cheated and don't plan on it.

I plan on showing up to the redeployment ceremony in Brian's car just to shut people up.

Brian is utterly confused by this whole thing.

On a positive note every time they talk about me driving the car they refer to me as a "hot chick"

He better be damn happy :P

2010-07-05T15:43:00.000-07:00

I just spent $270 on groceries for his homecoming. This does not even include perishables which I will not get till we are closer to when he gets home so that they won't spoil like right after he gets here lol. I also spent $50 on stuff to change the oil in his bike. The rain today was actually a clean rain so it very nicely washed the vehicles for me thank goodness. I am getting my hair and beauty stuff done on thursday and friday. On wednesday Brian's car should be out of the shop and all sparkly. Then I am going to stop by the carwash and vacuum out the vehicle. I still need to clean out the inside of the SUV as well. I am almost done with my list and he is almost home. We have so much we want to do when he gets home that I am worried as to if we will get it all done. But whether we do or not I know we will be the happiest we have been in a year. I am just so happy to have my helper home. There are so many things he did around the house that I took for granted. Here is my short list.

1. Help carry in Groceries
2. Dishes
3. Take out Trash
4. Clean out Litter Box
5. Help with laundry
6. Help keep apartment clean
7. Sex (yeah, yeah, we are horny people lol)
8. Going on Dates
9. Snuggling on the couch.
10. Sleeping together in bed.

There are so many others but those are the main ones.
I miss him so much. He will be home so soon I can taste it.

Shortest best post ever.

2010-07-01T05:45:00.001-07:00

HE COMES HOME THIS MONTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!!!!!

2010-06-28T19:14:00.000-07:00

They moved UP the date Brian is probably going to get home. This makes me so happy I cannot put my feelings into words.

So here are my count downs.

0 periods left
2 days left
same number of days as the age of an eighth grader.
96% done

:D

Oh and on a side note my parents are in town, that also makes me happy.

AND I had to reschedule one of my beauty appointments because it would be after he gets home lol.

Holy Hail Batman

2010-06-16T17:42:00.000-07:00

We got one hell of a rain storm today. Golf Ball size hail. Hurricane force winds. Power went out. It was crazy. Here is the negative thing. We got serious hail damage. So bad that it knocked the motorcycle over onto the truck and set off the alarm on the scion. The damage is pretty decent and will total out the truck because it is so old. The scion and bike will be fixed. We were already planning on selling the truck. This just speeds up things. And we will be getting more money this way than if we would sell on the open market.
But it does offer up a problem. We will be down to one vehicle after the truck is gone, which is fine..... Until we have to send the scion off to Hawaii a month before we leave. Then we will only have the motorcycle until transportation picks up our household goods then we will have no way to get around at all. That would be a problem.

However, my Uncle Russ is amazing and is letting us borrow his Jeep Grand Cherokee for that last month. Thank goodness because if he didn't we would have to rent for a month for $600 ugh. We will have to pay for the bike entirely because it is under our deductible of $250. And we will have to pay $300 deductible for the scion. But I estimate we will probably get somewhere between 2-4 thousand for the truck woohoo!!!!!!

Hello my name is Meghan

2010-06-11T19:25:00.000-07:00

And I am a GLEEk!

I hear admitting it is the first step, but I don't want to cure this addiction.

It has started

2010-06-08T09:16:00.000-07:00

I have started my deep cleaning of the house in preparation of Brian's return
Here is the list of things I will be doing.
1. ~~Laundry (already in progress)~~
2. ~~Wash the bedding especially the comforter~~
3. ~~organize my closet~~
4. ~~Organize Brian's Closet~~
5. ~~Clean and organize all the drawers and the desk in the office~~
6. ~~Get mattresses from my grandma~~
7. ~~Make bed in office~~
8. ~~Vacuum the whole apartment~~
9. ~~dust all the surfaces in the apartment~~
10. ~~Straighten the living room~~
11. ~~Straighten the kitchen~~
12. ~~Scrub all the hard surfaces in the Kitchen~~
13. ~~Scrub all the hard surfaces in the bathroom~~
14. ~~Wash the hard floors~~
15. ~~Bleach and wash the floor on the patio~~
16. ~~Wash down all the surfaces on the patio~~
17. ~~Get a new tank of gas for the grill~~
18. ~~Straighten the TA50 closet~~
19. ~~Organize the outdoor storage closet~~ (Brian told me to wait on this one)
20. Clean out and Vacuum the 2 vehicles
21. ~~Wash the 3 vehicles~~
22. ~~Get the chain and sprocket replaced on Brian's Bike~~
23. ~~Fix the baseboards that are peeling away in the apartment~~
24. ~~fix the carpet in the hallway~~
25. ~~Dishes~~
26. ~~Clean out fridge~~
27. ~~Grocery shopping~~
28. ~~take out trash~~
29. ~~take bags of clothing to Goodwill~~
30. ~~Take car into shop to get dents out~~
31. ~~Levy Briefing~~
32. ~~Transportation~~
33. ~~Finance~~
34. ~~Port Call~~
35. Haircut
36. Wax
37. ~~Turn on Brian's phone~~
38. Put new fairing stay on the bike
39. Fix crack in Truck windshield

And I am sure there is more. Anyone want to come help me? I have a month to get this all done.

Things I hate about this deployment

2010-06-03T20:35:00.000-07:00

1. 12 months away from my love
2. IDF Drills
3. "Fireworks"
4. The Internet
5. Not being able to touch my love
6. the War
7. People not understanding why he is there
8. People not understanding that it is not a choice
9. r&r is too short
10. Not being able to take care of my love when he is hurting or sick
11. Noone to cook for
12. Always alone in my house
13. Night time
14. very boring
15. No sex
16. Not feeling safe
17. Not being able to text him whenever I want to
18. having to deal with crisis on my own
19. Not being able to cuddle at night
20. Spending our entire first year of marriage apart.

But it is almost over. We only have 10% left to go. I love my hubby so much and it is totally worth everything that we have gone through this year.

Happy Happy Happy Happy

2010-06-02T15:57:00.000-07:00

Today was the stop mail date and I sent off Brian's last package.

Next Wednesday is the redeployment meeting with Rear D

I have one more AF

I have 5 more Trash Days

I need to get my waxing, hair, and nails done

I need to deep clean the house

I need to deep clean the vehicles

I am soooooooo excited

Oh and Brian sent me get well flowers because I have been sick. They are so beautiful. I love him so much.

I like a Boy

2010-05-26T21:39:00.001-07:00

soooo cute

We finally did it

2010-05-26T20:19:00.000-07:00

We switched from Bank of America to USAA. We were sick and tired of all the bank fees and we just realized that there are no BoA's in Hawaii. So we made the switch to USAA over the last month and the myPay website finally told us the direct deposit made the switch. It will be so nice because we can scan in checks and not need to go to the bank for pretty much anything and they refund you the ATM fees. And best of all the Army checks go in earlier to USAA than to Bank of America. Now because Brian still only has the Bank of America debit card in Iraq right now and he still has a few things he needs to do there we are not closing that account quite yet. But as soon as he is home it will be GONE and we will no longer have to deal with that fucking organization.

YAY USAA!

What a week

2010-05-23T08:19:00.000-07:00

It started off great.

and then shit hit the fan.

I had to get rid of Jarjar. He was too rough to bring a possible baby around and too expensive to take both animals to Hawaii. So he went to a family with a 7 year old boy. Hopefully he will be happier and get the attention he needs there.

I lost 2 friends over something that I apologized for and they just couldn't forgive me for.

I got my profile on facebook blocked by a member of the FRG because I "blocked her first" and all I did was put her on the same settings as the rest of the FRG so she couldn't see me complain about the deployment.

This deployment keeps getting shorter but keeps feeling longer.

I just want this all to end. I want to be a better chooser of friends. I want my husband home so I don't have to rely on friends so much. I don't want to deal with Drama all the time. I am really not a drama person. I do not understand why it keeps following me. Maybe it is Army wives because before I became an Army wife I NEVER had to deal with drama like this. I just want it all to end.

This week sucked.

I am way nerdier than usual today

2010-05-20T09:57:00.001-07:00

I just put together this model. It is Obi-Wan's Starfighter from the new trilogy. I think it looks amazing!

This one is an AT-RT walker

and this one is a droid Tri-fighter

I am so happy right now

2010-05-19T06:39:00.000-07:00

Brian and I are on a really good stride right now. We have been making each other so happy. His new work schedule has started and it allows him to sleep during the day which gives him really good sleep. So he is much happier and well rested. And when he is happier I am too. We also are beginning to realize that we have very little time left during this deployment and that has been bringing out spirits up. We have started to make plans for the after redeployment. Here are some things we are going to do when he gets home (in no particular order).

1. Eat at Tacos El Sol in Topeka
2. Eat at the new Olive Garden in Manhattan
3. Go to the Mexican Fiesta in Topeka
4. Go to Ren Fest in Kansas City
5. Go to Memphis to visit my parents and sister
6. Go to Ohio to visit Brenda and my Grandmother
7. Go to Arizona to visit Mandy Eileen, and Brian's Mom
8. Eat at Corkey's in Memphis
9. Eat at Pollyeyes and Tony Pacos in Ohio
10. Go see Eclipse

And that is just the short list. Only 7 more Trash days left :D

Never mind

2010-05-16T12:19:00.001-07:00

apparently I don't know what the fuck I am talking about.

Brian's Schedule got changed

2010-05-13T15:57:00.000-07:00

He will be working noon till midnight his time. That is 4am to 4pm CST. Because of this instead of being able to talk to him before and after work, I will only get to talk to him once a day.

This SUCKS!!!!!!

He wanted to work 7pm to 7am and had asked for that but his higher ups had other ideas.

On the positive end he will be able to do PT on his own and actually work on his back and abs again. Also instead of working in 150 degree heat all day long inside connexes he will only have 4 hours a day in the heat.

But we will have less time to talk and we are both not happy about it.

DEAR DEPLOYMENT, I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!!!!!!!

BAHAHAHAHAHA

2010-05-12T16:10:00.000-07:00

Created by Codey Wilson and his elite step team of volunteers. The video is an EXAGGERATED act of a possible future military that is open to any sexual preference. Please don't try to cause us any problems. We're just a few good guys trying to enjoy ourselves and get this deployment over with. No one in the video is gay... that we know of, nor am I. Sorry guys. Not that there is anything wrong with that! (political correctness) I am NOT saying it IS ok to be gay in the military. I am not saying it's NOT OK. As a student film maker I was forced to release this early due to our friend in Afghans lip sinked music video. I have to admit I feel a bit more creative but he has my respect. Making these things around here is really scary because we're taking major risks. You know you love it. Enjoy it. Spread it. Lastly, ignore the copy cats that will soon follow and keep your taste for original creativity. If you see anyone using this video for the wrong reasons please help out Thanks for watching. Next one is coming out in two weeks when I get home!

I do not mean to offend. But seriously how can you not laugh?

The day from Hell

2010-05-12T15:57:00.000-07:00

So last night my new meds made me not able to fall asleep. I woke up tired and hit the snooze for an additional 30 minutes. After I worked out I showered and I nicked the hell out of my legs. When I was talking to Brian online he could not tell me what I liked to do in my free time and the one thing he came up with I hate doing. Then before we could finish that "discussion" his internet cut out. I didn't even get to say goodbye. Then I posted a complaint about hating Iraqi internet and got told off on my board by a fellow FRG officer that I m being unprofessional posting something like that. Mind you I had already blocked all of my FRG families from seeing that post. I personally find it to be bullshit that I have to censor my words on Facebook to my families. I feel like I am lying to them making them think that everything is ok when it isn't. Right now I have the 2 boys I nanny for until tomorrow morning and they are driving me nut. Also there is a tornado warning in the area and tornadoes have touched down in the area. And I am PMSing.

So I am asking you.....Can this day get any worse, really?

I have Asthma

2010-05-11T14:37:00.001-07:00

I went to the doctor today because I was pretty sure I did have asthma. And he confirmed sports related asthma. He gave me an oral steroid for the lungs and an inhaler. I take the steroid once a day and the inhaler 2 puffs 15 minutes before working out. I told him that I had been trouble really finishing a workout to lose weight because I was breathing so hard. He said I had probably had asthma from the time I got pneumonia in 2nd grade and every time I got bronchitis when I was teaching it made it worse.

On a side note: The hospital visit was crazy fast. I got there 15 minutes ahead of time and was in out and had my prescription and was home 15 minutes after my scheduled appointment. 30 minutes total CRAZY

but I digress. so I took the steroid and the inhaler when I got in the car to drive home. I finished talking to Brian online for 30 minutes then I decided to try and work out. I am freaking amazed. I was able to control my breathing for once in my life. I ran and I didn't get winded. I just sweat. I am freaking amazed. I am also angry at myself that I have been dealing with this for so many years and never got it taken care of. grrrrr. It is actually enjoyable to workout.

You Don't Know....

2010-05-08T17:30:00.000-07:00

You don't know, but I'm the girl who cries every morning, and hopes every night for his safe return.

I'm the girl who drags herself out of bed every morning so that he will be proud of her when he comes home.

I'm the girl who lies in bed longing for him to be lying next to me.

I'm the girl who sits quietly because all I can think about is that next moment when he will safely be in my arms again.

You don't know, but I'm the girl with a million things to say, but not one will come out without the thought of him.

I'm the girl who checks my cell phone every five seconds just to make sure I haven't missed his call.

I'm the girl who stops and stares and wishes for him to return soon each and every time another man in uniform walks by.

What you don't know is that I know love on an entirely different level from most.

I know the love that spans time and space; that love that most people are constantly searching for.

I'm one of the girls who waits months for a single kiss; a kiss that will make the months apart worth every second. A kiss where everything in the world stops and for what seems like eternity, you can see into that person's soul and know that without them, life is not worth living.

I know more love in one homecoming, than most know in a life time.

You don't know that every time he leaves part of me goes with him and part of him stays with me.

You tell me that people change and I tell you, true love with always remain constant and steady.

You tell me, I'm too young to be married, I tell you, and I'm too in love to not be.

You tell me you know how I feel and that you understand what I'm going through; you have no idea.

What you don't realize is that I understand the true meaning of not only love, but of longing and anticipation.

-Author Unknown

Thanks Stacy!

I hate my lungs

2010-05-08T10:44:00.000-07:00

So I have sports related Asthma. I have for a while now. Usually it is just annoying. But now as I am getting older it has gotten worse. At first it was just when I worked out I would wheeze the whole time. Then add in when I was walking up stairs. Now I am just sitting on my bed and I am wheezing for no reason. I think all of the years of working in public schools and getting Bronchitis every year has damaged my lungs. I am going to the doctor on Tuesday to talk to him about actually getting an inhaler. Since I have not ever had an inhaler before. Maybe this will make it easier for me to run?

I have a jam packed week.
On Monday I am headed to Kansas City to get a piercing done.
On Tuesday is the Doctors appointment.
On Wednesday I work 24 hours and the FRG Bowling night
On Thursday is my payday and an FRG coffee social
On Friday I am getting my haircut and it is Brian's payday
My weekend is actually free lmao!

I also wanted to say in this post that I love my hubby so much. I cannot wait to have him back in my arms. We only have 2 months left. I think we can make it.

Sigh

2010-05-06T16:58:00.000-07:00

They say that what does not kill you only makes you stronger. I hope that is true after today. Because today sucked big monkey balls. I lost trust, got walked on by 2 little boys, and woke up tired. I just want this deployment to end. It will fix 90% of my problems.

Sigh.

BIG BIG DAY!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-05-03T22:42:00.000-07:00

Happy Star Wars Day!!!!
MAY THE 4TH BE WITH YOU!

I will be celebrating by watching all of the Star Wars movies and TV shows in order back to back. And if I have time, read a book or too as well.

I hope you enjoy your Star Wars Day too!

Wow I have been slacking

2010-05-03T17:08:00.000-07:00

I am so sorry loyal followers. My life has been pretty boring. Really the only thing happening in my life is that I keep getting migraines and my work schedule has changed. I promise something BIG tomorrow though. TOMORROW is REALLY REALLY Important.

New Bedroom furniture

2010-04-27T14:04:00.000-07:00

So Brian and I got new Bedroom furniture last week. We were in desperate need of new furniture because ours was a hodgepodge of random. So I went to the furniture store on post and got this set. It was only $1400. We are so excited! It got delivered this afternoon and I spent all afternoon putting it together. I hope you enjoy the pictures.

I have not been nerdy enough on here

2010-04-23T18:00:00.000-07:00

After all this is the life of a NERDY army wife. I have spent many posts on the Army and being a loving devoted wife but only 1 post so far on my nerdom. So here's to you Nerdiness. I am going to list all of the nerdy things I have done recently.

1. bought 2 star wars cookbooks
2. bought a star wars party book
3. bought a book called Obsessed with Star wars
4. Watched the original animated Transformers movie
5. watched Glee
6. Watched a 1977 Star Wars Trailer
7. Wrote in my blog
8. Read an Indiana Jones Zombie book
9. Watched some Anime
10. Read my husband's Super Street Bike Magazine
11. Planned a presentation for the FRG about OPSEC
12. Watched Season 2 of the Muppet Show
13. Bought one of the boys I watch a lightsaber
14. I am successfully nerdifying the other boy I watch by having him watch Nightmare before christmas, transformers, star wars, and indiana jones (he requests the movies now)
15. bought several fantasy posters
16. bought a dragon figurine
17. bought Brian dragon swim trunks
18. read a history book on ancient religions
19. read several books on wicca
20. watched some bellydance videos on you tube
21. Searched for some pinup girl clothing
22. Played Age of Mythology.

Am I nerdy enough for you?

Happy Anniversary

2010-04-21T17:35:00.001-07:00

In honor of Brian and my 1st anniversary here is our wedding video. Enjoy!

If you're not in love with a Soldier

2010-04-19T19:48:00.001-07:00

I got this from a friend's facebook notes.

If you're not in love with a soldier, you can't know adventure.
You don't know smelly gray PT uniforms that require a daily washing.
You can't understand green and brown camouflaged bags flooding your bedroom floor.

If you're not in love with a soldier, you can't understand the meaning of the phrase "Going to the Field" and the days you spend not hearing from or seeing each other.

If you're not in love with a soldier, you can never imagine the hole in your heart when that phone call comes."Honey, I am leaving tomorrow to go away for a bit. I don't know how long I will be gone or exactly where I am going, but I want you to know that I love you - always"

If you're not in love with a soldier, you don't know what it's like to say that final good-bye.
You don't know what it really means to be glued to the television.
You don't understand fear and you can't possibly understand the sleepless nights of endless crying wondering if you will ever see the love of your life alive again.

If you're not in love with a soldier, you can't know the immense joy, the uncontrollable smile, or the butterflies in your stomach when you see your soldier for the first time again.
You can't understand the self-control it takes to stand on the other side of the room as some higher-up gives a seemingly endless welcome home speech while all the soldiers stand in formation.
You don't know what it's like to have that second first kiss or what it's like to experience puppy love all over.

If you're not in love with a soldier, you can't truly understand how to make every moment count because you never know when that phone call may come in again.

If you're not in love with a soldier, you can never really understand how very delicate life is.

Thought on soul mates

2010-04-19T09:14:00.000-07:00

I know that Brian and I are soul mates. I feel like I knew him from the moment we met. We both had a love at first sight moment. And the funny thing is Brian and I both didn't believe in that bullshit before we met.

And on that note I think I have figured out why it is so hard to be apart from the one you love for so long. Brian and I spent our whole lives trying to find each other. We completed each other like pieces of a puzzle. But then came the deployment. We were forced apart right after we found each other. I think it hurts so bad because each of us accidentally kept a part of the other soul when we were pulled apart, and we are trying constantly to make ourselves whole again.

That being said. I miss my hubby terribly.

A little over 2.5 months left.

Sigh

I love you Honey B.

Aunt Flo

2010-04-18T13:45:00.001-07:00

Sucks Assssssssssssss!

That is all. I hurt. I want her to go away now.

Apparently I have no clue what it going on.

2010-04-17T15:36:00.000-07:00

My Period Stopped.

And Started again

And Stopped again.

And thus far it is stopped. I do know some women bleed through their pregnancy. But I am still testing negative on the home pregnancy test. Maybe why I am bleeding is that I am not producing enough hormone to totally hold off my period and set off the test. I have no clue. All I do know for sure is that I have a Doctors appointment for EFMP on Tuesday and I am going to have them run the blood test while I am there. GAAAAH My body like fucking with me. It is not fun!

ETA: It has started again and is very bright red. I think it actually has really started now. NOT PREGNANT. :(

Not Pregnant

2010-04-16T12:46:00.001-07:00

:'(

How have I not heard this before?

2010-04-14T19:41:00.001-07:00

Oh wait I know because I don't listen to country. But man this one hits the nail on the head.

Another Update

2010-04-14T05:16:00.000-07:00

I am 2 days passed my missed period. I am still testing negative on the pregnancy tests. Here is what the federal government has to say about the tests:

How soon after a missed period can I take a home pregnancy test and get an accurate result?
Many home pregnancy tests (HPTs) claim to be 99 percent accurate on the first day of your missed period. But research suggests that most HPTs do not always spot pregnancy that early. And when they do, the results are often so faint they are misunderstood. If you can wait one week after your missed period, most HPTs will give you an accurate answer. Ask your doctor for a more sensitive test if you need to know earlier.

So I think I am going to go stock up on dollar tree tests today and take one once a day until I either get a positive or my period.

I feel like I am playing bathroom roulette.

Update

2010-04-11T07:06:00.000-07:00

Well I am still testing negative. But the last test I took was yesterday. And, AF is not due for another 2 days. Here are all the symptoms I have experienced thus far.

1. Abdominal cramping off and on for the entire 2 weeks
2. My boobs HURT and they never ever hurt
3. Nausea when I wake up and after certain foods
4. Heartburn from hell
5. Diarrhea
6. So far none of my usual signs for my period, not even the usual acne
7. Mood Swings (Sorry about last night Brian)
8. Headaches
9. Food Cravings
10. I am super lazy and tired
11. I just don't feel like myself
12. Going to the bathroom a TON ( I used up 4 rolls of toilet paper last week alone)
13. One bout with dizziness
14. A couple of times where my tastebuds went on hyperdrive (Did you know there was oregano in pizza rolls and cinnamon in Diet Coke. Well my tastebuds told me so this week)
15. My Temp is up around 98 and usually it hangs between 96 and 97
16. Oh yeah and some really crazy ass vivid dreams ( last night I dreamed I married Justin Beiber just to corrupt him)
17. Gas

Signs I have not experienced
1. Actually throwing up ie. morning sickness
2. Implantation bleeding
3. Constipation

Now I know a lot of people don't test positive until after their period has been missed. My friend Dominique didn't test positive for 3 weeks after her missed period. Right now I am just hoping for a missed period on Tuesday. Wish me luck!

I want

2010-04-10T13:12:00.000-07:00

Instant Gratification Dammit.

Why can't life be like those "Right Nows" Netflicks commercials?

I want to know one way or the other.......

Ugh!

Sigh

2010-04-10T04:12:00.000-07:00

Le Sigh......................................................................

So Tired of Waiting

2010-04-09T14:02:00.001-07:00

Daily Entertainment

2010-04-08T07:35:00.001-07:00

Ok this is the Air Force and not Army. But this is freaking Hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!!

See more funny videos and Music Videos at Today's Big Thing.

Craptastic

2010-04-07T07:22:00.000-07:00

That is how I feel right now.

I've had heartburn for several days now. My abdomen hurts. My boobs hurt. My back hurts. I gagged several times yesterday. I had to work till 2am last night and could not fall asleep till 3am because of my heartburn. I had to be at work at 7:30am this morning. I still have indigestion. And there have been a few sad turns in my friend life recently as well. Thank goodness my hubby is so understanding. I just wish that I didn't take up all of his birthday morning with all my bitching and moaning. Speaking of

Happy 25th Birthday Honey B. I love you so much.

The History of Easter from a multi religious perspective.

2010-04-04T07:15:00.001-07:00

Easter is celebrated the world over to mark the resurrection of Jesus Christ – the Son of God. The young and the old, the rich and the poor, man and woman and people of all races celebrate Easter. However, Easter has been commercialized to a large extent by companies manufacturing Easter related goods and items and the greeting card industry. It is important that in all the commercialization of this very important festival, one does not forget the history of Easter.

History Of Easter

Easter is one of the most celebrated festivals of the modern Christian church. According to St.Bede, an English historian of the eighteenth century, Easter owes its origin to the old Teutonic mythology. The name Easter was originally derived from the word Eostre. Eostre was the ancient Greek goddess of spring. It was believed that every year, Eostre returned to Earth after a long, cold winter and brought along with her the light and warmth of Spring. Thus, ancient Greeks held pagan festivals to welcome Eostre and herald the onset of spring.
The Pagan festivals always coincided with the vernal Equinox on the 21st of March every year. Though the Greek were not fully cognizant of why and when spring comes, they believed Eostre must be pleased to ensure that she returns year after year. The festivals were lavish feasts that celebrated the booming of new flowers, the chirping of birds, butterflies, and sunshine and in general the feeling of rejuvenation that is inherent of spring.
The Christian church however, changed the Pagan festival from a celebration of spring to a celebration of the resurrection of Jesus. In 325 A.D. the church also changed the date of the festival. The festival was no longer held on the spring equinox. Instead, as per the Church Council of Nicaea henceforth it was to be held on the very first Sunday following the full moon on or after the vernal equinox. Thus, today Easter is celebrated on different dates every year and can occur as early as March 22nd or as late as April 25th.
Some people even believe that Easter is related to the Hebrew celebration, the Jewish Passover. Passover is celebrated to mark the freedom of the Israelis from bondage and slavery after 300 years. It was during Passover in 30 A.D. that Christ was crucified for being blasphemous. The resurrection happened three days later on what is today known as Easter Sunday. The early Christians, many of whom were raised as Jews considered the resurrection and Easter as a new part of pascha. Thus the early celebration of Passover came to be celebrated as Good Friday and Easter.
Today grand scale events mark the celebration of Easter in the United States and across the globe. Many traditional symbols of Easter continue to dominate the scene while new traditions are being part of the festival too. Thus, Easter is a festival that denotes life, rejuvenation, renewal, rebirth and restoration of all beings on Earth.

Pregnancy signs?????????????????

2010-04-03T17:12:00.001-07:00

It has been a week since I ovulated.

My abdomen has been cramping the last few days.

My boobs just started getting tender

I feel like my stomach is stretching a bit

My temperature is up.

And here is the big thing, I never get any of those symptoms when I am having my period.

Only one week left till I test. :)

I HATE

2010-04-03T07:13:00.001-07:00

THE TWO WEEK WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That is all.....

More fun time for Meghan

2010-04-02T09:19:00.000-07:00

Plans for today:

Lunch: Sonic's Ched "R" Pepper SUPERsonic Cheeseburger

OM NOM NOM! I can feel my arteries clogging as we speak

This afternoon:

Heck Yeah!

Update

2010-04-01T13:15:00.000-07:00

So Brian left Tuesday morning. I got to talk to him and he is securely back in Iraq. He goes back into work tomorrow. To keep my mind off things I have been pampering myself. I got a haircut, pedicure, and went shopping. I am doing so much better this time than the last 2 times he left.

On a separate note, I ovulated when he was home. I hate the 2 week wait. Also I have been having cramps like I am going to have my period, but it is way to early to be on my period. hmmmmmmmm, sign maybe?

Sigh

2010-03-30T06:21:00.000-07:00

Brian left on a flight this morning at 7:45 am CST.

I don't want to think about it.

So instead I am going to list off some positive numbers.

(for OPSEC sake these numbers are actually not accurate at all)

72% of this deployment completed
3.3 months to go
14 weeks to go
$886 earned in per diem pay so far
$2,110 earned in separation pay so far
100 days left.

Brian's Mom part 3,486

2010-03-23T20:17:00.000-07:00

She made it out of surgery just fine. They took out a foot of small intestines. She is recovering. She will not be home by the time Brian and I leave. Brian and I have been cleaning and preparing this home for her return. We have an entire room set up and a bathroom all for her and her recovery. Thank you every one for your well wishes. You have been so wonderful.

waiting

2010-03-20T11:44:00.000-07:00

Brian's mom is in surgery right now as I type this. She is having a section of her intestines removed. After this she will have a b12 deficiency and we need a monthly shot because of it. We are starting hour 3 of the surgery right now. They said it would take 1-4 hours. After she is out of surgery we will visit her for a bit and then head to Sierra Vista to help get her house prepared so she can come home and be destressed.

Update

2010-03-16T09:44:00.000-07:00

Brian broke his glasses (we have replacements here but they are an old prescription), had to buy new civilian clothes in Kuwait (because he is not allowed to wear shorts or army related stuff in civilian flights and he brought shorts and a company t-shirt), he is flying all over the freaking place through civilian flights, and will be in my arms at 9pm cst tomorrow. His mom is going in for surgery today because they couldn't wait any more. We will be leaving for our drive Thursday morning. We are not sure if we are going to make it a one day or two day drive. He flies back at 7am on the 30th a day early because of all the flight jumps again. I think I am going to convince him to come back a day or two early just to relax before he has to go back so he doesn't get sick from the stress. Ugh.

Brian's mom

2010-03-15T14:18:00.000-07:00

went back in the hospital and needs emergency surgery. They resent a red cross message and Brian got approved for 2 weeks of emergency leave. So I get to see my hubby today or tomorrow. It was a total surprise. I am so sad for his mom but so happy to get to see my hubby again. Positive things about him coming home. 1. sex 2. seeing my hubby and hugging and kissing him 3. he can put the fuse back in the car so I can have bass again in my music 4. we can try to get pregnant again. 5. It gave me an excuse to clean the house. 6. Road trip.

I am so excited. And sad for his mom.

What a Fing tease and let down

2010-03-12T13:42:00.000-08:00

So Brian's mom was put in the hospital 2 days ago. She was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease. She needs help and needed Brian to come home. She was almost going to have surgery. So she sent a red cross message to bring Brian home. We were so excited. We were going to be able to see each other.

It got denied by Washington. He will not be coming home. I am just crushed. I just want to curl up in a ball and cry myself to sleep.

Happy Birthday

2010-03-09T11:17:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday to Me!

Next Weeks To Do List

2010-03-07T16:22:00.000-08:00

Exercise at least 3 times this week
Eat Well
~~Dishes~~
~~Living Room~~
~~Bathroom~~
~~Bedroom~~
~~Kitchen~~
~~Vacuum~~
~~Office~~
~~Call Barton CC about Motorcycle Course~~
Work on Anniversary gift
~~Call Progressive and cancel B's policy~~ We even got a refund check headed our way.
~~Celebrate Birthday~~
Deposit money in bank account
~~Grocery shopping~~
Wash the pets
Make pillows for living room couch
~~Clean off Patio for Spring~~
Read a few books
Watch some more Anime and TV series
~~Take out Trash~~
Take Jarjar for a walk every day. Boo Rain I might not get this one done today.

Looks like I have a busy week.

The Military Wife

2010-03-06T17:44:00.001-08:00

I wear no uniforms, no blues or greens.
But, I am in the military, in the ranks rarely seen.
I have no rank upon my shoulders. Salutes I do not give.
But in the military world is where I live and am rarely seen.
I am not in the chain of command, orders I do not give or get.
But my husband is the one who does, this I can not forget.
I am not the one who fires a weapon, Who puts his life on the line.
But my job is just as tough, I’m the one who is always left behind.
My husband is a patriot, a brave and pride filled man.
And the call to serve his country not all can understand.
Behind the lines, I see things needed to keep this country free.
My husband makes the sacrifice, but so do my kids and me.
I love the man I married. The military is his life.
So I pledge to support my hero and stand among the silent ranks known as
THE MILITARY WIFE.

Score my point was made

2010-03-06T06:48:00.000-08:00

He talked to Brian today. Brian did not get in trouble like all of you naysayers thought. Here is the email I got back:

Meghan,

firstly, i will not e-mail you without letting your husband know,I just found it odd that your husband didnt have any college and i wasnt trying to force him to do anything. i did think it would set a good example for his soldiers and it seems hard to tell soldiers to do things that you have done. I have college and it actually didnt take very long once i applied myself. I to, cannot take classes online and since weve have been deployed I felt that most people have have time to take a course.It wasnt my intent to upset him only to nudge him to better himself and to set a good example to his soldiers ( not that he isnt already).

once again i would like to say thanks for what you do and that my intent was not to get things stired up up .

thanks for your time,

SFC G***********

He he I win!

I just emailed Brian's Platoon SGT

2010-03-05T08:44:00.000-08:00

Yeah I know I shouldn't have but he is trying to make Brian sign up for College classes. Thats right make him go to college. So here is my email to him.

My name is Meghan Sestokas, wife of Brian. I know that I have never contacted you, and that this is not the greatest first impression. And I apologize for my forthcoming in advance. However, in conversing with my husband today he informed me that you are trying to get him to sign up for college before he leaves Iraq. I could not let that blunder go unchecked.

There are several reasons why it is impractical and illogical for Brian to sign up for college classes. First and foremost, he wants a technology degree in Automotive sciences and they do not offer those classes online. Second, He cannot take classes online; it is a learning disability. Third, if he were to take classes they would not be in his chosen field and thus a waste of government money. Fourth, because of his punishment he will never be able to become an officer so taking college courses will do very little for his career in the Army. Fifth, College is a personal decision who are you to tell a person what they should do with their life? Sixth, if you force him to take college classes he will be unmotivated and not make the best grades he could be making. Seventh, we will be leaving for Hawaii in September. There is no way for him to finish a single course in that time period.

I understand that it would set a good example for the soldiers under him. However, there are plenty of other qualities that Brian has to look up to. It would set a worse example for the soldiers seeing Brian struggle and being forced into this.

I have my college degree in Secondary Education with an emphasis in Social Studies. And I have started masters level work. I know the requirements that college courses need. In order for College to have any real affect on Brian's points he will need at least 60 credit hours. An average full time student takes about 18 credit hours a semester. So in doing the math, Brian would have to go to school full time for 2 years in order for college to have an affect on his points. You and I both know that signing up for a few classes here and there will have no huge affect on his career and will not benefit him much.

If you made it all the way through my email, then I commend you. I tried to be as honest as possible. I just hope that you understand that I am trying to look out for the best interests of my husband, who I care for and love deeply.

Thank you for your time.

Meghan Sestokas

PS Brian does not know that I am emailing you. He told me about this tonight and I had to say something.

My favorite Star Wars things on the web right now.

2010-03-03T18:31:00.000-08:00

So ironic. I love it.

Best desk EVER!

I want this so bad. A real light saber.

My baby will come home from the hospital in this.

Even though my dog is male I so want him in this next Halloween.

When I finish losing weight I will own this costume!

OMG lightsaber Chopsticks!

I have this decal on the back of my SUV.

Yay Star Wars happiness. I am such a nerd!

Dishes

2010-03-03T06:50:00.000-08:00

I hate Dishes.

I hate dishes with a fiery passion of a thousand suns.

If you look at my last two to do lists you will see that I avoided dishes both days.

I think my hate for dishes started as a young girl when my chore for allowance was dishes every single night. Even if I didn't eat the food I still had to do the dishes. I hate the smell of the old food. I hate scrubbing. I hate dish soap. I hate dish pan hands. I hate putting dishes in the dishwasher. I hate putting dishes away. I hate stuck on food. I hate everything about dishes.

When Brian was home he always did the dishes because he knew I hated them so much.

I want my hubby home. I am sick and tired of doing dishes.

Well I didn't finish everything yesterday/ Birthday Gift.

2010-03-02T05:17:00.000-08:00

1. Dishes
2. ~~Eat well~~
3. ~~Exercise~~
4. ~~Work on Brian's Anniversary Gift~~
5. ~~Research Brian's Birthday Gift~~
6. ~~Go to Hobby Lobby for "supplies~~"
7. ~~Pick up "stuff" at Walmart~~
8. ~~Email State Farm the motorcycle Safety Certificate~~
9. ~~Email Progressive Power of Attorney~~
10. ~~Go to bank for Notary to get me off ex's Car~~

Crap I have a ton to do today. I hope I get it all done.

On another note. I got Brian's Birthday gift for me yesterday. They are white gold and black sapphire hoops. I love them so much. They are so me. When I wear them it makes me feel so much closer to him. I love him more than life itself.

Technology hates me this deployment.

2010-03-01T17:34:00.000-08:00

I think each deployment has something that always goes wrong. My friend's deployment issue is health. Mine happens to be technology.
I have dropped my laptop,
Brian's car battery died,
my windshield wiper motor died,
Brian's laptop died,
the Dish box dies 3 times,
The first zune I got didn't work at all,
Brian's PC stopped sending out a monitor signal,
The scanner stopped working,
I can't find any of Brian's pictures on his computer,
The remote for the dish box had to be replaced,
MSN messenger stopped working on my phone,
The list could go on and on.
I just want something to actually work for me.
GAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok back to my to do list because I have totally been slacking.

2010-02-28T19:44:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow's to-do list

1. ~~Elliptical~~
2. Crunches
3. ~~Eat well.~~
4. ~~Vacuum the living room~~
5. ~~Laundry~~
6. Dishes
7. ~~Talk to Brian~~
8. ~~Call and Pay Brian's car note~~
9. ~~Return my brand new Zune that refuses to turn back on. :(~~
10. ~~Transfer Brian's motorcycle insurance to State Farm~~